Ep. 20: How it started

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IN THIS EPISODE:

  • Every 10th I discuss a mentor – today it’s my Master Coach Instructor Brooke Castillo, THE LIFE COACH SCHOOL
  • Where it started for me
  • Top tools to help you – in work and life
  • Over desire
  • The power of choice

TRANSCRIPT

Hello hello hello – what’s going on my friends?
Episode 20 – how fun.
You know what that means – every 10th episode I share one of my
Mentors with you – someone who has made a significant difference for me, and I think the tools will help you.
Today I want to tell you a little about my Master Coach Instructor – Brooke Castillo – and how her work has truly been the catalyst for all of my changes –

Looking at how my life has changed propels me each day, to think about you, and develop ways to share these tools to help transform your life in ways you may not even know are possible.
So – I’ll start from the beginning.. not to worry / not like when I was 9.. lol – although that could be an entire podcast – when I was 9 I was a fat kid – and so much could be discussed from that.. lol
So I would say about gosh – maybe 3 years ago my friend Annette turned me on to a podcast called The Life Coach School.
BTW –  Annette Q –  she is a life coach as well, totally check her out.
Annette and I go back to like Oprah Gratitude Journal days – So for me this podcast seemed right up my alley.
The Life Coach School Podcast is about “real topics, real coaching, and and real advice”.
Since I’m also still in sales, I’m in the car a lot, and every time I listened to an episode I felt like I was learning new ways to approach life – it was so good.
Now listen – I’ve said multiple times – I think I have a pretty good life – I have an amazing husband who supports my kind of crazy – a great family, and of course our amazing pup.

I’ve been successful in the corporate world for years , but I just thought there was something more to do – like another level of living.

Do you know what I’m talking about?  Maybe because I was approaching 40 – I just knew I wanted something more – but wasn’t really sure what that was.
I was listening to the podcast for – I would say a year plus – and again – you guys – Ive talked about passive and massive action in previous podcasts – this was a lot of passive action for me.
I would listen as I was driving, and maybe implement a thing or two – I would see some changes, but it wasn’t until I started in her program Self coaching scholars that I started seeing true, lasting, change.
So again – Annette was the first to sign up for that – and I was telling myself I didn’t have the time, and wasn’t sure about the money.
Telling ourselves we don’t have time and money for our own mental health is such a BS story we tell ourselves. And I’m saying that because I’ve done sooo much work on my thinking around time, and I know what kinds of things people spend money on every single day and I think our mental health ranks above so many of those things.

I really encourage you to pay attention if this is your kind of story.
So I decided to try it – for one month / and I have to tell you – I haven’t gone back.
As I invest more time and money in myself, I see at each level my life gets better and better – and I want to keep sharing the stories and concepts so you know it’s possible for you as well.
If you recall episode 17 and 18 I discussed the
Model – if you missed them I encourage you to go back and listen.
Brooke developed the organized way we discuss the model – but a number of leaders discuss the concept – sometimes referred to as the think feel act cycle – sometimes people will say it’s Universal Law.

What she has developed in The Model is a way to look at how your current thinking, determines your current results.
So – as I continued through Self Coaching Scholars I saw what a difference actually doing the work was making – and it was from there I decided I wanted to be a life coach.
It’s funny – I talk about how I cut back on drinking – I was literally in a parking lot of a local restaurant meeting my husband for a glass of pinot g after work when I decided to commit.
Funny looking back.
So Brooke actually has a school as well – The Life Coach School – ingenious name eh?
The tools and concepts I teach for stopping over drinking and overeating are primarily from what I’ve learned at the school with her as my Master Coach Instructor.
The biggest thing we do as life coaches – and with our clients – is manage our mind.
This is everything.

Because our thinking determines our feelings, which drives our actions, to get us the results we have in life.

And the biggest feeling that has us reaching for the extra wine is over desire.

It’s similar to why we reach for the extra food as well.

Everyone has their own thinking that causes it, and that’s what we work on in my program.

Reducing the over desire so you literally don’t even want the extra wine or cookies – which is a beautiful thing; because then you are not feeling deprived in the long run.
So, over desire is a big concept we work on individually, but I also  want to share a couple of examples of some different tools – or concepts –  where you might also benefit  – some of the basic things I see, help clients make lasting change.
I’ll give you examples you can use in work – and for drinking less.
Ok – first big take away.
Everything in your life is a choice.
Sometimes it doesn’t always feel that way, but the way you respond to anything external will always determine your outcomes.
Knowing you always have a choice in life allows you complete control.
Sometimes we act as if something or someone else is to blame – as if we have no control.

I encourage you to take a moment and consider what the upside of thinking you have no control in your life is.
None.
It is so disempowering. But I get it – we have been programmed to look for external validations – it just isn’t useful in creating the life you imagine.
Last week I talked about how control over my time was something I felt victim to for a long time – I would say at least the last 13 years of my career. I always told the story I have no control over my time as far as work goes.
And I had a very good story to back it up. I wont bore you with the details, but anyone who knew my job would agree.

The thing is – I felt terrible about that.  Such victim mentality.

if you are thinking something like this, I want to share one thing I was shown through coaching – which made such a difference for me  – you are staying at the job – therefore You do have control over your time.
This can be a hard one to fully grasp to begin, because so often we’ve told ourselves a story – but I assure you – when you know you always have a choice – you are so much more empowered to take action for yourself.
Another area I see I’ve cleaned up my mind in the work area is with the drama. And – this has given me more time to be productive at work.

Think of the drama you hear from co-workers about other co-workers or situations.  It is fascinating to me now when I take a step back and look at how much un productive banter goes on – and in my opinion that just puts everyone in an ick mood which doesn’t serve up too much productivity right?

You have a choice to par- take or not.Let me give you an example – for those of you in sales I’ll use the example of inventory.
You know there are times when inventory may be low – I think this happens in any market – we used to run out of air time when I did TV sales! Air time people.. lol
So think about if this happens to you. You have something at work that is out of your control – something like inventory count.
You have a couple of options – what I used to do was bitch and complain about how we couldn’t do our job if we didn’t have inventory – Discuss how I would never make my number – and complain and commiserate with co -workers about how terrible it was.
And you know what – nobody sold anything because they were too busy complaining.Now, the next option is thinking something along the lines of – I will figure out how to get this done.  C’mon sales people out there– you get paid to figure out how to get it done- and my guess is – you are successful, so you do figure it out in the end.

What I want to offer to you is – imagine if you just skipped the complaining – that alone puts out in front of so many other people, and instead you just kept focusing on thinking “I will figure it out.”

It is so much more productive.

As for an example specific to drinking…

I remember when I first started the work to cut back on drinking.

I had previously wanted to cut back, would tell myself I would only have one at night, and then I would wake up the next morning knowing I had more and being so frustrated because I wanted it to be different.

But again – everything is a choice.

Sometimes people will tell me it almost feels like they are drinking against their own will because they really didn’t’ want to have the extra wine.

Nothing has gone wrong.

I mean – let’s be real – it is always our choice to get our butts off the coach to head to the kitchen, to pour the extra glass.

The thing is – we have just wired our brain to believe it is necessary, so the work is in unlearning what has brought us to this point.

And the unlearning goes back to using the tools I discussed in the early episodes of this podcast – the tools to plan, sit with urges,  as well as learn and move on.

It has nothing to do with using willpower – which may be what you’ve tried in the past, or are currently struggling with.

I learned all these tools from Brooke.

And they have helped so many women cut back – or quit drinking.

Because here’s the thing ladies.

You know there is something more.

You are driven, you are successful, and being able to figure this out just takes it all to the next level.

Imagine a time when you can have only one glass at night, or just on weekends, and here is the beauty – you don’t feel like you are deprived because you don’t even want the next.

It may seem far off to you know, but I promise you it is not.

It is so much better now.

Now listen, Brooke has so many more tools and I could go on and one.

I continue to learn from her every single day, and I am committed to sharing all of it with you, because I am on a mission to help women take their lives to the next level – and it may just start with a little less wine.

If you are ready to do this work I encourage you to head to michellebourquecoaching.com/freebie and download your guide on how to drink less tonight.

If you are really ready to do the work I also encourage you to sign up for a free consult with yours truly.  It is such a great way to look at what you have going on now, discuss what you want to accomplish, and determine a plan to get you there.

It’s 30 minutes that could change your life.  So much fun.

OK – that’s what I have for you today.  Let’s circle back next week – but for now – make it a great day – take care!

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